It's A Boy!!!

Chris and I went yesterday to get another ultrasound at the specialist. They were looking for birth defects and we were hoping for a girl. It didn't take her long to tell us it is definately a boy no question. His lip and nose look perfect and so does the hard palate. She said he was about 8 oz right now.

So everything looked so good that we don't even need to go back for any more ultrasounds. I was glad to hear that. I am a little sad that we aren't having a girl but God knows I probably don't have the patience for a girl and all the drama. I was a tom boy myself. I am very experienced with boys and I am so relieved he doesn't have a cleft. I can breastfeed and I am happy. God gives us what he knows is best for us.

We still haven't picked out a name but we've narrowed it down to a few:

James Andrew

Judah Andrew

Jace Aaron

Josiah Allen

Or something like those. We still have plenty of time to decide. This pregnancy has been different than the others. I haven't really had time to sit and think about it. I'm so busy with my 3 and babysitting all the time I almost forget I'm pregnant. Now that I'm starting to feel him move some it's becoming more of a reality. As I get bigger I am sure I won't forget it. I am taking it with more ease this time. I guess because I've already done this 3 times I know what to expect and I'm not worried or scared. I am relaxed and I don't think about it too much. With Jacob I worried about how I would get him out and watching Discovery Health one night, a lady in labor, I almost passed out. (pregnant with Jacob) And with Jaron all I thought about was his cleft. I worried all the time and wondered how I would feed him. With Jonah I was still busy getting Jaron through therapy and knew Jonah would be fine so I didn't think about it much accept in the end when I was HUGE and miserable.

This baby is different. I feel calm and relaxed without any worries. I am starting to show and I know it will get harder as I get bigger but I hope to control my diet a little better this time. We'll see....

Our Trip to Boston...

..well it was not without problems but I won't get into those details and give the devil any credit. We arrived at the hotel wed. night and got settled in for bed. Thursday we woke up and ate dunkin donuts and oatmeal for the boys for breakfast. Then we went downstairs to meet the babysitters provided and get the children settled in. Then Chris and I went up to the 16th floor to listen to some doctors speak about cleft lip and palate. They started at birth and went up through the teenage years talking all about dental issues and surgeries to come. I learned a lot about what to expect in Jaron's future and took 2 pages of notes. The other speakers didn't really pertain to Jaron so we relaxed the rest of the day. Chris napped with Jonah and I took Jaron and Jacob to the pool. We ordered pizza for dinner and tried to get to bed earlier that night.

The hotel garden...a place for the boys to run around and play.

The tunnel to get to the pool.

Friday breakfast was provided and then they got huge buses to take everyone (hundreds) to the New England Aquarium. We all wore matching shirts and this is Jaron with his friend Seth.

We got a cab back to the hotel and then left again on a hotel shuttle to the Children's Hospital. We got their a little early so we shopped in the CVS inside the hospital. Stocking up with snacks and drinks for the hotel room and a new toy for the boys.

Jaron's appointment with the doctors was at 2pm so we headed over to the clinic. The waiting room is nice and big with toy cars Jonah rode in and a huge chalk board and books and other toys too. Jacob watched tv and played with his new hangman game. Chris waited out their with them while I took Jaron back to see the speech specialist and then the feeding specialist. They were very thorough and didn't rush. I came prepared with reports from all Jaron's local doctors and they were happy to see those.

Overall Jaron's speech is not perfect but he is doing ok. Some air is escaping out his nose because his soft palate is a little weak. It might be too short or just not closing all the way when he speaks. They want to do a speech study next year. (x-ray while he talks) He might need a p-flap surgery next year. And they watched him eat a few snacks and said he doesn't have great chewing skills. He might be forgetting the food is in there or maybe he can't feel it all. We are going to start back Occupational Therapy ASAP to try to fix this problem. I need to find an excellent therapist who specializes in this area. He may even have some nerve damage in his mouth. He doesn't use his tongue very well either. They said he is doing a tongue thrust but it is mostly a problem for teeth not swallowing.

Then the put us in a room with his plastic surgeon Dr. John B. Mulliken and the dentist Dr. Bruun and about 15 doctors in training. We sat at the front, Jaron and I, and it was a little overwhelming at first but if you know me....I'm not shy so I got used to it. One came up with a flashlight and shined in Jaron's mouth first looking at his teeth. Noting his overbite and how is teeth touch in the back as well. His back teeth seem to be aligned pretty well right now and it looks like he may only need a palate expander and may not the broken jaw surgery. Nothing is for sure right now. We are just waiting for his adult teeth to come in and see what they look like and where they are located.

Dr. Mulliken (plastic surgeon) was very pleased with his scars and said he doesn't anticipate a lip or nose revision. I asked will Jaron's nose get any flatter and he said the nostrils shouldn't widen and the tip is flat but shouldn't get any worse. He will need his deviated septum corrected but not until age 18. One lady looked up close and said I can't even see any scars. (THAT WAS AWESOME) Dr. Mulliken said to me "you're the one who keeps sending me all these patients." and I said "Yeah I've sent a few your way" :-) He is so nice and took us in another room with his personal camera to take some pictures of Jaron. He asked about my pregnancy and told me to make sure they do the ultrasound right. I asked him should I keep sending him patients or is he retiring? He said "You know I just got married, I'm a new man!" So he took another close look at Jaron's lip and nose and said how good it looked. He said his lip is a little flat but once he gets his teeth in his lip will stick out more normally. Right now Jaron doesn't have his 4 front teeth (2 missing incisors and 2 extracted front teeth.) So next surgery could possibly be next summer for p-flap (palate extension) and then dental surgery age 8 or 9.

Overall I am very happy with our visit to the hospital. After 3 hours of doctors and waiting for Jacob & Jonah we took the boys down to the hospital playground and then got a cab back to the hotel. CCA kids provided dinner in the hotel ballroom. And they had a magician there for the kids. THEY LOVED IT!!!

Jaron's friend Daniel and his family.

Saturday breakfast was provided and they planned a pool party for all the kids 11am-4pm Lunch was provided as well. Chris's dad came to visit since he lives close by and we spent most of the day with him but took the boys to the pool for a while too. Dinner was provided by CCA kids that night too in the hotel ballroom.

Jonah was so curious about this guy and he kept finding him in the crowd walking over to look. I know it was innocent and I told him to say "hey". His dad was very nice and didn't mind me taking a picture with his son Scott. He is 26 years old. Very sweet guy.

Sunday breakfast was provided and we said our goodbyes. Our flight home was good even though we sat by the engines and couldn't see out the window---at all.

Jonah did better on the flight home but didn't fall asleep until we landed so Chris had to carry him off the plane.

In Atlanta airport going out to the van. We were all ready to get home. It was fun but it's always nice to get back in our own beds. Notice Jaron with his new Toy Story backpack with wheels. He was so proud of that thing. He felt like a big boy wheeling it around the airport.

Going to this family retreat was educational and humbling. We met so many children and families with many more medical issues than we could even imagine. I almost felt guilty for being there. Jaron looks normal and some of these children will never be normal. They were all so precious and I wish we could get to know them more. So many children with all different syndromes from all over the country all came together to make friends and form relationships with ones they can relate to. A place where they felt normal like they belonged where no one would judge them and they could truly be themselves. It was precious. We are so blessed.

Well I've been feeling baby moving the last few days. It still amazes me that there's actually another little person inside me!!!

Father's Day

Well I got so busy packing and planning for this trip to Boston I forgot to send out Father's Day cards. So I'll dedicate this post to my dad.

He's always been there for me when I called and always had encouraging things to say. He raised me to think positive and find the good in everything. He taught me to avoid conflict and don't start trouble. I owe a lot of who I am today to my dad. Even though we live in different states I know he would be here in a minute if I needed him. I guess you could say I'm daddy's little girl.

He was here when we had our first child and stocked my freezer full of meals. He encouraged me and hugged me when we told him about Jaron's cleft lip. He congratulated me when we announced we were pregnant with our 3rd son Jonah. And he was also happy to hear I'm now pregnant with our 4th child. He has always been supportive. What more could a girl ask for.

Thank you Dad Happy Father's Day! I love you.

We've come so far

I've been reading doctors reports and preparing all my questions for our trip to Boston. My mind goes back to all those days of struggling to feed Jaron and hours in surgery. He's been so strong through it all and always smiling.

He is so beautiful inside and out. There are many days (no matter how many times I fuss at him for misbehaving) that he will walk up to me out of the blue and say "mommy...I love you". He still gets in my bed in the middle of the night and always "needs" a kiss before bedtime. I so miss his widesmile but we had to let the surgeon correct it so he will be able to live a normal life. I thank God for giving this child to us. We learned to trust in Him more than we ever had before.

Boston Here We Come!

Well we are going to Boston next week for a Children's Craniofacial Association Annual Family Retreat. They have been so generous in covering our flights and hotel expenses. This is our first time attending and I am sure it will be lots of fun. We are also going to be meeting with Jaron's surgeon and dentist at the Children's Hospital in Boston as well. I have lots of questions and can't wait to hear what they have to say about his facial growth, speech and teeth. I know there are more surgeries to come in his life and I dread them. But we have to do it because I want him to look normal and feel normal.

We have tried to instill in our children that God makes us all different and they are all special. We don't make fun or point at others because of how they look. He is going into kindergarten next year and if he comes home crying one day because someone picked on him...I think I will fall apart. That has been my worst fear. Up to this point no one has ever come right out and made fun of him or ever said anything to him about looking different. I am just putting him out there (in kindergarten) and I am so nervous. I can't stand the thought of someone breaking his heart. Please God protect my little boy.

Sunday Morning

I try to dress the boys in similar colors for church. Jaron used to have a shirt like Jonah's but I can't find it. The laundry is a little overwhelming at times, but that's why I just pile it in their closet and close the door. Out of sight....out of mind. Until Sunday when I'm looking for matching shirts. I am constantly rotating out clothes, winter, summer and the next size up. Jacob is really the only one who needs new clothes and if they don't get stained with chocolate milk, we pass them down to Jaron and if he doesn't cut them with scissors or rip holes in the knees then Jonah gets them next. I just go shopping in our attick when I need the next size for them. That is definately a blessing of having 3 boys. We have shoes everywhere and all sizes and colors. That is one thing they wear out though. We took the first picture and then Jacob said lets make a funny face!

Jaron's sticking his tongue out and if you click on the picture I'm pretty sure it will open up bigger. ENJOY!!!

Jonah dancing

We put some music in today and this is Jonah dancing with one of the little girls I babysit. So precious...

All of it....

Not the Bity...

When Jacob was little and Jaron was just starting to talk, I told them one day about the saying "I love you from the bottom of my heart". I always thought that sounded silly because if you think of the shape of a heart (we draw) its little bity. That's not enough! So I started telling them "I love you, all my heart" and Jaron said one night "not the bity...all of it". So that kinda stuck with us and we always say it every day and it's our little thang. So now I've taught it to Jonah....Every night at bedtime I say to him (after the prayers) "I love you, all my heart" and he says "not the bity....all of it." So precious. I love my boys and if this baby growing inside me is another boy I will be ok with that. God has really blessed us with very smart and handsome children. But if it's a girl.....she might be spoiled. :-D

PS. I'm going tomorrow for a regular check up and will be BEGGING for an ultrasound. I'm not supposed to be getting one and insurance may not even cover it but it can't hurt to ask.

Sometimes I wonder....

...why people don't put the trash in the can?
...if Jaron will ever learn to eat better.
...if it's wrong to take prenatal vitamins with a coke?
...will I ever feel this baby moving inside me?
...how crazy driving a car was before they invented carseats.
...why is listerine called an "Antiseptic". Are mouths septic?
...if water and soap get us clean then why do the baths and showers ever get dirty?
...what it would have been like to live in Bible days and eat all natural food
...is bottled water really any different than the water in my kitchen sink?
...where would I be today if God did not save me Nov. 16, 1996
...what will Jacob be when he grows up?
...will Jaron learn to follow the rules in kindergarten?
...will Jonah always have gorgeous eyes or will that innocence wear off?
...what would I be without my husband and our boys?
...when will I learn to go to bed at 10pm?
...how many actual readers I have on this blog?

A fly on the wall...

If you could be a fly on the wall at our house you might hear some silly things like:
"Mommy how do cows sleep?" They close their eyes just like us Jaron.
"Mommy when you drink coke does it splash on the baby's head?" (Jacob)
"No you cannot bring lightning bugs inside....they will be sad....they want to be free outside"
"if you hit your brother with that belt I will spank you with it"
"close your mouth and eat your food" (that's impossible!)
"Mommy is 'flew the coop' a bad word?" (Jaron heard it on Clifford)
"I'm gonna woop oo butt" (Jonah with a belt)
"Spongebob said stupid" (Jaron) "Well we don't repeat everything we hear on tv"
"I can't find Jesus" (Jaron looking at the clouds one day in the car)
"Where da moon?" (Jonah in the car looking out the window)
Jaron kisses my belly and Jonah says "NO MY BABY!"
Jacob said "Mommy I feel sorry for you cause they have to cut your belly to get the baby out"
I told him its ok they'll give me medicine so I won't feel it. (I've never had a c-section for those who don't know this is just easier than explaining a vaginal birth to my 7 yr old. boy)
"Don't leave food on the carpet, it makes ants" (I say this a lot and not sure why it "makes" ants but it does.)
"Get up in the chair and sit down" (kinda confusing)
And with three little boys you will hear me say on a daily basis "Get your hand out of your underwear!"

I have to start writing this stuff down. There are so many more but this pregnancy brain is erasing my memory fast. Goodnight...hitting the pillow early tonight. :-)

Pregnancy Brains...

I took the boys to the park the other day and they always have fun there but I can't get them to slow down long enough to get a picture. There is train tracks right there at the park so we got to see a HUGE train go by very loud but they loved it! Jaron didn't want me to take the picture so he put his head down.

This is my Nanny...My mother's mother. Jonah has fallen in love with her. He does this every time he sees her and is so shy he can't even talk. He just watches her talk and smiles. He kept reaching for her earrings in the car. We went to mom's for Memorial Day lunch and she rode with us. Jonah mentions Nanny almost every day. It's like he's thinking of her. So Precious.

Well I tried to get another picture of Jaron but he covered his face again. My hair looks awful but oh well. I was playing around with black and white photo editing.

Jonah wore this hat most of the day today. I'm not sure why but he loves it! I got the camera and said "Jonah smile!" he said "CHEESE (flash) let me see" He always has to see the picture after you take it.

So here's one of me and Jonah. Not the best but I also did some color editing just to see if I could make my hair not look ORANGE! What do you think?

Well I titled this pregnancy brain because that's what I have. I want to post every day but can't always remember to. Sometimes I'm too tired to think of anything to type. The other day I actually went to bed without brushing my teeth for the first time in 11 years of marraige. I know it's nasty but that just goes to show you I was exhausted. I realized it when I laid down but was too tired to get back up and do it. So right now as I type, my eyes are closing and I still haven't taken out my contacts or brushed my teeth.....

gotta go!!!