Thursday, March 03, 2011

Filtered

I feel like sometimes I think about who will read this before I type. Should I say that? Well maybe not...it might offend them. But this is my blog and I do have the freedom of speech. But do I want to be fake? Should I edit my feelings before I type them? Why not I edit pictures before I post them. I don't want anyone to see my in my night gown or my pile of laundry on the couch. I guess filtering my thoughts is not a bad idea. What do you think? Do you want to hear the whole truth and nothing but the truth from me? We all have those faults we'd rather not talk about and that is another thing I edit....my faults.

Well I'm tired of keeping it a secret....maybe if I put it out there I will feel more accountable and be more motivated to change. So here goes....I yell at my kids and they watch too much tv. (only approved videos) I don't have enough patience with them. I am sure I'm not the only mother out there like this but here I am admitting I have a problem and I need to work on it.  People tell me I'm such a good mother but I don't understand what they mean? I feel so bad about these things and I wish I could change. I have tried but it's very hard. I have prayed for God to help me make it through one day without yelling at the boys and I haven't been able to do that yet. I guess as they get older it will only get harder. So I need to keep praying.