Monday, February 21, 2011

Discouraged

Chris and I have been married for 12 years and we have been regularly attending church for about 11 years.  We are trying to allow God to guide us in every area of our lives. Chris has been called to preach and I am learning every day more and more how to be a submissive wife. I love my husband and I trust him with our future. I know he is looking to God for His will in our life.

We attended our first church for 9 years and our feelings were hurt....things were said....and we decided it was time to move on. God sent us to this church we are at now and it hasn't been easy. We always feel like outsiders. Even at the other church. We never really "fit". I am not sure if it's because he's from up north and southern people like to make lots of jokes about that. Or maybe it's because I don't wear pants. God convicted me about that when Chris got called to preach. So as a preachers wife I try to set a good example and dress modestly. Maybe it's because we aren't fake. We don't want to be fake and we don't even know how anyway. If there is something we don't agree with or we're not happy about you can see it on our faces.

I guess most people in the world today know how to put on a pretty good show even when they are boiling inside. Life isn't always easy...fun...or perfect. We all have our ups and downs. I don't think there is anything wrong with showing your emotions. Chris has been criticized for being a "hot head". Well I have news for you people I am just as bad as him. We just don't pretend to be something we are not. What you see is what you get with us. In church, walmart or at home. We are always the same. We don't have split personalities. So maybe people think if we get angry in public it must be worse at home. Well it's not....what you see is what you get.

Our pastor recently resigned and our church is in search for another one. It's not easy. We are praying and looking for the man God wants us to have. It can be discouraging to hear other christians talk bad about preachers. I know that people aren't perfect and we all sin, but it's hard to live for God when so many are falling out of church all around you. It's no wonder people don't go to church at all. When you've been hurt like we have it can be very discouraging and make you never want to go back.

But we have children we want to raise in God's will. They need to know about His mercy and grace. We have to prepare them to face the world on their own one day. It's our responsibility as their parents to keep doing what we know is right. No matter how much the devil uses others to discourage us. We refuse to let the devil steal our joy!