Ok the pregnancy hormones are really getting to me. Or maybe it's just the weight of the baby straining my back and altering my mood. These days standing for any length of time is almost impossible. I am getting more and more braxton hicks contractions. For those of you who don't know what it feels like to be pregnant or can't understand. Have you ever had that burning in your stomach after doing a lot of situps? That is how it feels "BURNING" when I stand for longer than 10 minutes. My stomach stays in a hard tight ball the whole time but when I sit or lay down it relaxes and then the baby kicks around.
So anyway....babysitting too late at night trying to do homework, baths & dinner is not easy. Chris is so good about doing laundry, homework and anything else that needs to be done. I just want to do more and don't know how to relax. So I over did it today. On top of all that I am feeling like a bad mom. My boys don't always listen to me (shocker) and then I have to fuss and then I feel like a bad mother. It's vicious cycle and I wish I knew a better way to make them behave. I hate yelling and spanking. It makes me feel so bad when they come to me later with kisses and hugs saying "I love you". It hurts my feelings to know they can behave for their teacher at school and not get in trouble all day but when they come home they just ignore me. Just one of those days....I let the devil steal my joy.
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